Friday, August 24, 2012

August 26, National Go Topless Day

You know, I understand the point of these type of "awareness events" and as a guy I clearly support this for the most obvious of reasons but yet-and-still I think sometimes people whose chests no one wants to see take this type of stuff as a green light to embarrass themselves in the name of "awareness" and "equality". Yes, I know, I'm completely missing/circumventing the point of this awareness day when I talk about people embarrassing themselves but you're also probably missing my point, lol. Which is, if you want men to treat you equally, I think that you might be better off by doing the things they [men] consider themselves to be the "best at", better than they [we] do. And even then as much as we will respect you and treat you equally for it, we're still men. We're flawed in that special way. The way that says: "Man, Donquisha is so much better at my job than me, I love working with her because she's super sharp ... But DONquisha got that DONKEY though!" That's pretty much how we work. Sorry, that's just the way it is and yep we know we need to try harder to not have penises and lustful moments but again, we're men (yes, I know we need to stop saying/being sorry too, we're a shambles). And YES, we'll try to do better, but do we ever really try hard enough [to meet your standards]? I mean think about your ex, did that bama try hard enough? Really?

So anyway, it's abundantly clear that you have won the shirts off competition a long time ago because you've got breasts (duh)! Most men love breasts even when they come in small packages. Green peas, bazookas, low-hanging fruit, whatever you want to call them, most men don't have them and don't want them but sho' wouldn't mind seeing a pair. That is unless you've got a horrible pair. Just like a women doesn't want to see a man with man boobies and taco meat, NO MAN wants to see a pair of terrible tatas, I'm just saying. With that being said, ladies, women, girls, please take the following into consideration this Sunday when prancing around topless should you choose to do so:

My point in all of this is to say that National Go Topless Day is great if it empowers women and helps them become more equal to men in some way. But in the big scheme of things, it may just be contributing more to the chauvinistic stereotypes that most of us men have regarding women. The same ones that the good men try hard not to fall victim to and that good women try not to fall into.

P.S. - For more information on National Go Topless Day, visit (NSFW, btw).

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