I just listened to the song above by Ne-Yo. After listening, it's obvious that Ne-Yo has taped some of the conversations me and Woo have had and/or done some hacking into my email account. Dude pretty much ran through the litany of things that make an independent woman so attractive to me.
"Cuz she walk like a boss, talk like a boss. Move like a boss, do what a boss do...something about a woman that can do for herself. I look at her and it makes me proud."I just randomly picked a part to quote as I am rushing out of the office, but the key here is that she really is a "boss". Not faking it. It's a sheitload of women out here that walk like they're worth a million bucks and as a result, too good to talk to "yo azz". But lots of times it's only a cover-up for other issues of self-worth that they have. And then there are women that are doing well for themselves but still maintain the humility and social skills to be easy to talk to, down-to-earth, and have something worthwhile to talk about aside from a bunch of trivial bowlshyt.
And d@mn if Ne-Yo didn't hit the nail on the head with a sledgehammer on this one. I was just having an e-versation with a friend about this topic yesterday so it kind of hit home for me. But Ne-Yo neatly describes the type of woman that turns me on and impresses me. Of course he doesn't cover everything though. And yes it is something about a woman that has her stuff together and doesn't need you but chooses to spend time with you because she genuinely enjoys you and sees as much in you as you do in her.
To each his own - I know some of you fools like a trophy wife or a chick you can manipulate/control all the time - but give me Miss Independent.
Not too independent though. Some women take that shyt to a whole new level that's a bit extra.
14 comments:
OMG... thank you thank you thank you thank you for this post... all the men over at RBW always give me slack for saying I want a man but dont need one... and checking men that are intimidate by an independent woman... but what you said right here is me
"And then there are women that are doing well for themselves but still maintain the humility and social skills to be easy to talk to, down-to-earth, and have something worthwhile to talk about aside from a bunch of trivial bowlshyt."
but they seem to twist that and think that every independent woman is like the first type you mentioned... thank you so much for this post...
and I am loving this new ne-yo record... even blogged about this song on my page today... about to copy and paste what you said in the comments... hope you dont mind
I don't mind at all. Me and my buddy have conversations about these types of women all the time because these are the type of women that make an impression on us. But at the same time we realize that what we think isn't necessarily what everyone else thinks.
Glad you enjoyed the post.
Oh yeah...RBW?
I am actually speechless....
Yes, you and your friends are in the minority. Not many professional brothas like and appreciate independent women. And yes, not all of us are too independent for our own good. Wow.
For some reason, I can't help but think of that Hova line from "One Minute Man," when he says, "Get your independent arse outta here - question?" Looks like he changed his mind. He gushed about his independent woman all through Glastonbury - so you all do exist.
Girl you are never speechless. Stop fronting! LOL.
Good point about that Hov line verses how he carries stuff now with B. But how can he NOT respect her independent arse when she probably makes close to as much bread as he does and has all the fame as well?
OHHHHHH! I think that was a cut! Yes, Sir Mike, sometimes I am speechless. I only come off talkative on Blogger, I'm actually a bit quiet in person. But what about you...
Quiet? It depends.
Do you know any independent women, like the ones you speak of?
A few that are and a couple that are on their way.
ok. i was hoping it wasn't a lost cause. you never mentioned that it was actually out there. phew!
No way! Why would you think that?
I am not worried about whether they're out there as much as I am worried about making sure I am ready to be the man that "she" wants.
Aha! I hear you on that last sentence. Maybe a little harder than you're expecting tho.
Umm. I guess I thought that because I was having a convo with some older people who think there are less quality women out here then men. I was hoping that you, being a male in my generation, thought there were miss independents out here. I know who I roll with but others may not see it that way. ya know?
I feel you. And I believe there are a good amount of quality women out here.
I actually don't think it's going to be that hard from either perspective though.
I know a few women that are on point like Miss Independent and I don't tend to attract or pursue women that aren't at least headed in that direction.
And I figure if I'm a work in progress and someone sees me as such as likes where I am and believes in where I'm headed, then things can work.
The big issue I have with Miss Independent is that sometimes she's a bit too independent for her own romantic good and can end up in her mid-to-late 30s with no man but extremely high standards that unfortunately, she'll be more likely to find in men that are already married or men that are ghey.
But in the end, different guys value different things in women so I think that a lot of independent women end up intimidating dudes who aren't confident or realistic about who they are and where they want to go in life.
..blah blah blah...yada yada yada...You know how I type.
regarding women who are too independent... as long as a woman understands her role in a family - in subjection to a man who treats her as well as himself - you'll be good to go!
I agree. A lot of women seem to lose track of that. Then again, some may not necessarily believe in being submissive to that extent though.
My theory has always been that if you carry yourself like a grown man and handle your business and (like you said) treat her as well as you treat yourself, then a woman shouldn't have a problem with letting you lead.
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