Let the Mark Cuban Suicide Watch begin....

Now that it looks like the Dallas Mavericks are going to lose their playoff series with the Golden State Warriors, I'd like to officially start the Mark Cuban suicide watch! Hopefully this guy doesn't off himself after Baron Davis drains another clutch 3-pointer in the fourth quarter of game 5. Then again, I'm sure some people wouldn't mind if Cuban took the suicide plunge.

Mr. Mark Cuban - billionaire, owner of the Dallas Mavericks, owner of HDNet, blogger, entreprenuer, and the most intense owner eVAR in the NBA - will probably spontaneously combust if the Mavericks lose this series in the game 5 in Dallas. Not just because the series would end with a home loss, but because he won't be able to withstand the mail onslaught he'll probably receive after Dallas had one of the most magnificent seasons in the NBA, eVAR, only to lose in le premier rond.

It's a shame that Dwayne Wade's comments about Dirk not being enough of a leader to carry his team to a championship appear to be all the more true at this point. But at least Dwayne and Dirk will be able to talk over their differences in opinion while everybody else is fighting it out for a title.

Meanwhile, my Wizards will be getting swept shortly just like Orlando and Miami. I guess I'll jump on the Suns bandwagon...I'll going to pray that boring azz San Antonio does not make it to the next round. Please, PRAY with me!

NewsFlash: The Orioles still SUCK! But AutoStitch doesn't!

Since this is a New Era, I got a fresh new hat"

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Last night me and my man J-Rock (Jon) went to see the Orioles play the SOX (Red Sox). Jon was nice enough to let me and his cuzzo Dane battle over the second ticket and naturally, I won. Okay, we didn't really battle. I offered Dane to go (read: bowed out) so there would be no kicking of my azz, to which he responded that I could go ahead and go. So that's how I ended up at the game.

As usual, the Orioles sucked. As usual, baseball was boring. Though I will say it is a little more fun being at the game than watching on TV. Jon and I spent most of our time talking about non-baseball related things, drinking beer, eating peanuts, laughing, and joking about how bad Manny Ramirez, Curt Schilling, and David Ortiz were going to thrash the O's (even though I had that bright azz Orioles hat on I jacked from my brother). Speaking of, here are a few shots of those guys I was able to get.

Big Papi (David Ortiz)



Curt Schilling



Manny Ramirez



In the end, the Orioles lost (as we both expected them to). We left right after the 7th inning stretch (gotta be there to sing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game") and headed to our cars. All-in-all it was fun because I was there with my boy and we had some banging seats about 10 rows behind home plate. And whenever I'm with one of my boys, we can pretty much make any event fun/enjoyable. Even though the game was boring, I'll probably go again sometime in the summer if I'm bored and have $20 to throw away on something.

Now for the more interesting part of this post. A week or so ago, my co-worker introduced me to this application called AutoStitch. Basically, what AutoStich does is allow you to take all these pictures below and combine them into a single shot.







You may not have noticed, but these pictures are panning the baseball stadium skyline from right to left. I took all these photos right after one another in about 20 seconds time by shooting, moving the camera a little to the left, shooting, and so on.

When I ran the pictures through AutoStitch, it blended all those pictures together to create this (click on the picture for full version)...



I took this flick and cropped it to create the final image you see here (click on the picture for full version)...



Now to me, that's DOPE! To learn more about AutoStich or to download the (free) application, visit:

AutoStitch

1 YASELF! Peace!

LOL: The Anatomy of Dr. Jay

Don't let the rainbow fool you...It's just dinner

First time evAr that I've cooked kabobs on the grill. Kind of surprising considering how often I cook on the grill. Yet and still, today I got my colorful grillin' on...

Before...


During...


After...


YUM!

60 Minutes does not support the silent treatment

"This is so stupid, I might start snitching about old stuff just to show that some of us have some sense!"

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Arguably the most embarassingly ignorant stuff I've seen in a while. When they interviewed the kids I honestly felt embarassed that mainstream America will see this and think that young blacks are unintelligent and ignorant.

Hopefully urban youth get a whiff (of 60 Minutes, yeah right) of this and see how counter-productive this whole stop snitchin' mantra really is. But then again, maybe they'll stop gentrification and provide equal education to all children without consideration of level of income. It'll be interesting to see which one happens first. I'm holding my breath.

Flicked up: My Weekend In Review

The joys of having a new camera!

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Fri-Day

This past weekend was my 5 year college reunion. I'm dating myself, I know. Anyway, I didn't go to any of the reunion events because I ended up having other committments. Not that I really was itching to go hang out with my former classmates anyway considering I really only hung with about 20 people when I was in school and we all keep in touch. Back on topic though, I registered for the reunion so I had to go pick up all the free stuff that you get for registering. And of course because I am a clown I had to take a couple pictures with the stuff I got for free. Enjoy...


Yes, they were giving out some Jon "Ray" Kearney FLAT-AZZ hats and I got one!


No Hopkins Alumni picture would be right if it wasn't in the campus bookstore!


COLD BAMMER!

Friday Night
Before we got our table at the Cheesecake Factory, I ran into a guy I went to school with by the name of Jeff. Check out Jeff's myspace page. We went to Hopkins together and I ran into him Friday night outside of the Cheesecake Factory in Bethesda. We chatted it up for a second and he mentioned that he's a singer/songwriter and he was headed to NYC to put in some studio time. I checked out his myspace page and I've only listened to his profile song, but I like it.


It was Bay's birthday so we hit the Cheesecake Factory and then Ozio's in DC.

Saturday
Saturday was my Family Day for the month of April so my grandmother, grandfather, mom, stepdad, brother, stepbrother (and his girlfriend) all got together at my grandparents place.


My grandmother smiling as usual.


Mom Dukes!

And her are some more random family shots from Saturday at my grandmother's house...





And I almost forgot, but here's a picture of my mother's motorcycle. She doesn't know how to ride so I'll be teaching her over the next month or so. On my list of things to do before I die...Go for a ride with my mom and grand-dad on our motorcycles. Hold up, I don't have one yet...Gotta work on that!



No flicks from Sunday but I did cut my grass for the first time, put my grill together, and grill some chicken, hot dogs and beef kabob.

WebNerd Alert: Google makes it rain!

When they're showering out money to scoop other companies

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On April 13, 2007, Google copped DoubleClick for $3.1 million...IN CASH! (PacMan Jones ain't effing with that!)

In yet another bold move in their quest for world takeover, Google has dropped a fat knot to cop one of those up-and-coming web companies.

"The sale offers Google access to DoubleClick's advertisement software and, more importantly, its relationships with Web publishers, advertisers and advertising agencies."

What this means for us is that as time goes on, an increasing percentage of the ads we see online will be driven by Google. It also means that if we click on these ads and purchase things, we'll be supporting Google.

Surf the Wall Street Journal? You're getting Google ads. Communicating on Myspace? You're getting Google ads.

I am beginning to think that soon people will hate Google as much as they hate Wal-Mart (who also has a plan for world takeover). We'll see though.

If Google and Wal-Mart partnered, there'd problee be mass suicides across the country as *some* would think that this is the first phase of Armageddon. Or, there'd be nerd and rural militias (respectively) popping up out of the woodwork to defend themselves.

But until then, I'll be sitting back watching Google make my life easier and coppin toothpaste, toilet tissue, and boxer briefs from Wal-Mart.

And in case you have missed previous rants about Google...

Fred Phelps: Ghey as a muffuga

That's some serious hatin' you're doin' bruh!

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You know how they say that people who hate something a lot secretly love it or they secretly hate that same thing in themselves? Hence the title of this post...

My co-worker had me look this guy up today because he thought this guy was hilarious. Hilarious as in, so ignorantly serious about his hatred, that it is comical. This recommendation to look-up Fred Phelps was the result of a conversation my co-worker and I had about church and spirituality.

Come to find out, ole' Freddie Boy is quite the allegedly-Baptist-BIGOT! He particularly hates homosexuals (and Swedish people for some reason or another which is quite weird and random it seems). He also sympathizes with Fidel Castro and lauded Sadamm Hussein. Not to mention he's the founder of the Westboro Baptist Church which is classified as a "hate group". Fred and his followers like to picket military funerals and gay pride gatherings using God's anger as his reason for his hatred. Evidently, this guy has missed a few sermons and/or bible studies in his day.

His level of hatred is at once saddening, angering, and (quite) comical. For more on the ignorance and hatred that is Mr. Phelps, check out the first few paragraphs of his Wikipedia bio. It's some classically sad stuff. He sounds like the type of character you expect to have seen Jim Carrey portray on "In Living Color". He also reminds me of the black, blind, KKK member on the Dave Chappelle Show. This has gotta be some Branch Davidian type stuff, I'm tellin' you!

Needless to say, Mr. Phelps is a shining example of freedom of speech gone awry and used for evil. God Bless America!

I walked right into an episode of The WIRE

I was hoping to see Herc and Carver round the corner any second...

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Yesterday I had my evening planned out:

1. Leave work and meet Sei at the gym
2. Leave the gym, go home, cook the steak I have thawing out
3. Work on a website and then hit the sack

I never thought that my night would go the way it went...

5:31 PM: My boy BHill calls me and tells me he ran out of gas. He tells me he is on some street in Baltimore city and he needs me to bring him some gas. Me being the friend that I am, told him YES without a thought. I found out that my co-worker had a gas can, asked him if I could use it, and began to make my way out of work. I called Sei on my way out the door and told him we could push the gym appointment to 7pm. He agreed.

5:45 PM: I'm at the gas station getting gas...Gas for my car because I realized I was almost on 'E' and I didn't want to run out of gas taking gas to him. I also filled up the gas can with about a gallon of gas.

5:55 PM: I look at my cellphone and BHill's called me twice (I missed 'em) and when I go to dial his number he calls me again. I pick up:

BHill: "Yo son, I think somebody's throwing rocks at my car or something. My car just got hit by something. You gotta hurry-up and get here...You know where I'm at right?"

[Me thinking: "These Baltimore ni99as is crazy"]

Me: "You are on Aisquith, right?" [realizing Aisquith is straight grimey] "Man, you are in the hood ain't you? (LOL)"

BHill: "Yeah son, shyt is wild over here. Holla at me when you get on Aisquith! You not that far away."

Me: "Cool. Be there in a minute."

It was at THIS POINT that I realized where he was and that I: 1) needed to get my knife out the trunk and 2) might be walking into some wild shyt. I never did get my knife out of the trunk...

I get to Aisquith about a minute later and talk with BHill up until the point I see his car with hazard lights on, on the side of the road. He tells me that someone's pulled up in a SUV behind him really really close and they have a hoodie on and he can't see anything but the guy's face. At THIS POINT, I am starting to get really nervous because I realize he has run out of gas at "Latrobe Homes." For those of you from urban areas, you know that when a housing development has no grass and a sign with a name on it, it is the PRO-JECTS!

6:10pm: I pull up in front of his car and get out. I notice the black SUV parked right behind him very close. As soon as I get out of my car I notice about 5 young guys (teens) standing in front of a door to one of the apartments. One guy sees me get out, throws his hoodie over his head, and immediately walks towards me.

What am I thinking at this point in time?







This is when my bowels loosened.

I am going to my trunk to get the gas can out and I am a little scared because I think he might think I'm "goin' to my trunk" for real for real and he takes me out. He was obviously a look-out boy for someone in the area. I slowly open my trunk and pull out the bright red gas can and hold it up just high enough for him to see what it is and not blow my brains out. He sees the red gas can, turns around the other way, takes his hoodie off and walks back to where he was standing. Meanwhile, BHill is getting out of his car and grabs the gas can and immediately goes to put the gas in his car.

I SWEAR, this was the longest 1.5 minutes of my life watching him pour the gas in his car with a guy in an all-black hoodie in the SUV behind his car staring us both down. Right about the time he finished pouring the gas, the SUV pulled off and my bowels went back to normal. I hopped into my car and waited for BHill to turn his car on and start driving up a little. He did, and we rolled out.

I think I sweat a river...

On the way to our respective homes, we talked/joked via cellphone about how we'd just dodged death and he thanked me for "saving his life". But I know for a fact we were in serious danger. I'm just glad it was still daylight outside. If it was at night, I might not be here typing this post right now.

THANK YOU JESUS!

If this was an episode of The WIRE, Marlo would have just shot us.

My Fav Videos at the moment...

Joell Ortiz - Hip Hop

This is some real hip-hop right here. I am going to jump out on a limb (yeah right) and say that this is some of that banger NY hip-hop we all used to love back when Biggie, Nas, Wu-Tang, Mobb Deep, and Jay-Z first dropped. We still love it now, but we just don't get it as much as we used to (no Eric Benet).



DJ Khaled and errrybody - We Takin' Over

This is problee my favorite song out right now. Even with the useless presence of Fat Joe on the track I still like it. Joey does do a good job of riding the beat on this track though.

This is another lead-off banger for Khaled Khaled. Holla At Me Baby was that lead single/crew joint that got me to go out and cop his first album. This song is going to make me go cop his next joint...Notice a couple things in this video though:

1. Ricky Ross takes a shot at 50 in his verse. Short, but sweet
2. "Some say Khaled, some say Khaleeeeeed". Classic Fat Joe. What's even more classic is that throwback Versammage shirt he has on. Welcome to 1997 CRACCCKKK!
3. They kept Baby's verse short. Thank you Lord
4. "Feed me rappers of feed me beats". Lil Weeziana kinda rips it
5. Akon and TIP do they're usual...

Kanye, NaS, KRS-ONE, Rakim - Classic (DJ Premier Mix)

The best hip-hop song out right now. Oh yeah, it's about Air Force 1's. This song will be played 10 years from now and give me the same feeling it does today...TIMELESS!



Pretty Ricky (feat. Sean Paul) - Push It Baby

This one is just to pi$$ Dane off and to let you guys know that Pretty Ricky has ANOTHER hit on their hands. You guys already know I was feeling the HotLine song and now this joint is probably going to be as popular as that one. One question I have is, who is pumping money into these Pretty Ricky videos and their promotion? Somebody has to be getting a HUGE return on investment off these joints. And we KNOW it's not Pretty Ricky's A.D.H.D. having azzes! They are the most annoying energetic set of guys I've seen in a long time.