Battle of the Gangsta Cornchips

"Gangsta cornchip" is a term I first heard my friend Shawn (RIP) say a few years back referring to some guys around my neighborhood. The way he used it was to describe some guys who acted tough but really were soft and not as gangsta as they tried to appear. That stuck with me for whatever reason and I've been using it ever since.

Yesterday, after laughing tremendously at every aspect of the 50 Cent (aka Half-Dollar) versus CamRon "beef", I realized that this is truly a battle of the gangster cornchips. Let's check out each one's resume (and fruit-a-licious flick):

50 Cent

From Jamaica, Queens. Has gotten shot 9 times. Beefed with Supreme McGriff, Irv Gotti, Ja Rule, and others who are less relevant at this point. Has not been linked to actually shooting anyone, only fighting Ja "little guy" Rule at the NBA All-Star Weekend in ATL a few years back. It's been purported that he's a snitch/rat/informant for the police. He's rich enough to not have to want to be a gangster anymore (if he ever were).

Claim to fame: Terminating Ja Rule's career quite viciously and capitalizing on the ensuing success, turning himself into a millionaire.

CamRon

From Harlem. Has gotten shot once, which he says Jay-Z was involved in. Mediocre rapper at best, but very distinctive style. Known for wearing PINK. He even owned a pink Range Rover. Watched his best bud Jennie Jimmy Jones get stomped out at the Rucker Park some years back. Related to pastor Ma$e but hates him now. Has not been linked to ever having shot anyone or getting into a fight. He too probably has slightly enough money to not want to be a gangster anymore (if he ever were).

Claim to fame: Well, he's not really famous unless you are a fan of rap music. But I would say his claim to fame is probably one of the following: 1) beinga habitually wack/confusing/weird rapper; 2) getting shot at Howard's Homecoming a couple years ago; 3) being ridiculously ostentatious; or 4) dropping that "Come Home With Me" album while he was on Roc-A-Fella Records. Then again, he is Ma$e cuzzo, so that probably helped a bit too.

So you take one guy who's an alleged snitch that got shot NINE times and has lost the ability he used to have to rap aggressively and viciously (see "Many Men", "How to Rob", etc. his earlier work)

...

Pit him against a guy who rocked pink faithfully for like 2 years, drove a pink Range Rover, and watched his boy get stomped out.

If that ain't a battle of fake-azz gangsters I don't know what is!

So I call their beef the "Battle of the Gangsta Cornchips".

First and foremost, it's like Biggie said:

"Don't you know bad boys move in silence and violence?"

No real gangster is going to begin the onslaught of e-beefing that these two clowns have initiated. Peep the history:

First, 50 goes on HOT 97 ("HOT 97 should be read as: instigator and proliferator of stupid hip-hop beefs) and Cam calls in to defend the honor of the illustrious KOCH records (LOL):



That Cuuuuuuurtis line is hilarious though.

Subsequently, 50 uses all his richness and ultra-swag to shoot this "diss video" at his place in Connecticut. I'm still confused by this because I don't understand why he's shooting such a thugged out video at his crib. You got these guys with red rags, Yayo bites the top off a beer and gives it to some chick, there's a firing range in his crib that he's shooting at, guns everywhere, dumbazz "Wouldn't Get Far" girls among the guns and liquor, all sorts of stupid shyt that just doesn't make sense. To me at least.



"Computer's the puting..." That's funny. I used to make fun of that line too. He'll say stuff like 'Zabbin the Judah' or 'rooting the tootah' and think it's hot.

Next, CamRon comes out with his own diss record aimed at Cuuuuuuurtis. I personally think that the whole Cuuuuurtiss yelling thing is hilarious!

Cam Diss - Cuuuuuuurtis

It was actually after I heard this song that I heard about Cuuuuuurtis.com. Now that is taking this whole beef to another level. The comedy involved in watching two grown men beef over the InterWeb tickles me. I can't help it, "Imma grown azz kid!"

And of course, since 50 shot a video to his diss, Cam did the same thing...



Let's say it in unison everyone, CLOWWWWNNNNNNNNN!

Now there has emerged what I consider the icing on the cake.

www.camerongiles.net

Of course, this is Cam's real name and who knows the person that purchased this site and threw up the homepage...

Needless to say, this is one of the silliest hip-hop beefs of all time. But at the same time, it proves that the InterWeb is your friend even if you want to make a bama of yourself for the world to see.

Trust me, I should know!

Personally, I think this beef is really just getting started and these two NYers have some more bamafied moves in store that will shock, disappoint, and entertain us all. Because after all, I do find this stuff entertaining and hilarious or I wouldn't have just typed d@mn near 1000 words about it. Hopefully, this crap stays on wax and no one gets hurt other than pulling an abdominal muscle from laughing at these clowns!

Meanwhile, in real hip-hop news...