Tuesday, April 28, 2009
I Got It For CHEAP!
Tamiflu that is!
And I have it for cheaper than the Clipse old manager Geezy. My homegirl just sent out a tweet asking whether or not she should go to Mexico for a Memorial Day wedding. I told her sure, if she's wearing this...
Or even better, this...
My exact words to her were: "Eff with that pork flu if you want. Mexicans are dropping like sleezy villains in a Jackie Chan movie". Perhaps a bit corny and over-the-top but I'm sure she gets my point. With that said, I still didn't tell her NOT to go. Who better to risk a Mexican pandemic for than a friend? Not that I'd risk it for any of you (I kid, I joke).
Honestly though, I feel kinda bad for her because I know she loves to travel and how loyal she is to friends. Yet-and-still, if anyone is going to catch flu generated from an animal that produces bacon, sausage, chitterlings, and scrapple I'm not even going to explicitly say who it would probably be (again I kid, I joke).
Seriously though, this swine flu outbreak has something fishy written all over it. Why do I think this? Because yesterday I was watching the nightly news and there was a reporter/anchor/whatever at the Texas/Mexico border who said that people coming into the US from Mexico weren't even being questioned. Huh? If this thing is a potential US pandemic as well and we're raising pandemic code levels and such then how come your average Mexican or American returning from Me-hee-co can stroll right across the border without some d-bag border patrol officer at least asking him/her if they've coughed, sneezed, sniffled, or puked like an under-aged party girl within the last 48 hours? It's not like a double-shot of Vicks NyQuil (no Lil Wayne) is going to cure you.
This leads me to wonder if this is all just a front to kill off the Mexican labor force here in the U.S. and provide all these jobless Americans with some meaningful work. Yes I know that the majority of people that are dying are in Mexico but who is to say that they weren't potentially headed here to "work". Think about it, if the *millions* of "hispanics" working labor-intensive jobs (and yes I know that there are plenty of "hispanics" that don't do labor-intensive jobs) somehow can't work, then that'll provide some meaningful work/income for all the Americans that got laid off but have been to prideful/lazy/elitist/arrogant to do all the work they think only Mexicans should do. It's similar to how some folks thought back in the day that this country should only have been built on the strength of the negro, the blood of the Native American, and the so-called intelligence of "everyone else". Not to mention that the first settlers in the U.S. were the lowest class of society where they came from. It's nothing like a bama coming from jail telling you to clean his boots, wash his underwear, toss his salad, and accept that you're intellectually inferior. But I digress.
Nevertheless (foreverthemore), providing U.S. citizens with jobs is one need that seemingly trumps saving Mexican lives. That is, aside from taking Somilian lives. And what better way to help strengthen the U.S. economy than to provide lazy Americans with jobs that they'll be horrific at?
With all that said, I will be faking the flu for about three weeks and getting a refillable prescription of Tamiflu. I encourage those of you that really need the Tamiflu to either get your own or if you want to be price-gouged holla at me for the Day2Day hook-up. If you found something in the least bit interesting/funny on this blog in the last couple months I might even slide you an extra half-pill just for massaging your boy's upper region (read: ego). Secret is out that for the next couple months, Tamiflu is the NEW CRACK! Scratch that. Tamiflu is the new Cialis. Scratch that too! Tamiflu is the NEW TWITTER! You don't really understand how you got there or why you need it, but you use it like it's going out of friggin' style.