Friday, June 9, 2006

RAGE!!! Somebody PLEASE lend my neighbors $1100!!!

I got woke up this morning at 630 AM by my neighbors. Why? They were arguing over $1100 and I could hear them through the d@mn wall. This really pi$$ed me off this morning.

I know some of you may be thinking "it's just 630 AM, that's not that bad!" SPEAK FOR YOURSELF EARLY BIRDS! I'm TIRED! 630 AM is ridiculously early for me considering I don't have to be at work till about 830 AM and not even my overly-hygienic a$$ needs two hours to get ready for work...For the club *maybe*, but work? No way!

So I had to try and stay asleep through about 45 minutes of:

"What the f^ck is $1100 gonna do? Pay rent and bills?"

"Don't try to be my friend when I get you the $1100 on Monday!"

"Get the f^ck out my face!"

"I'm bankrupt because of you!"

"Just because you go out and work everyday, you think you're doing something?"

I'm telling you guys, these comments are ALL THE CONVERSATION consisted of for 45-straight-minutes! RIDICULOUS! After reading this, you might think I live in a ghetto-a$$ neighborhood. But it's actually pretty calm and cool around here. But man does it burn me up when my neighbors have an argument in the AM and I can hear it through these super-thin walls. It's bad enough I can hear them bumpin' uglys [just gagged/virped...swallowing...] from time-to-time. This is almost as bad as that! ALMOST!

Fortunately, there wasn't any violence and it was all verbal. I guess that's the one good angle to take on this one. But man oh man was I heated when I woke up to that crap. Since I am living solo, I think I'm going to start faking arguments in the morning just to let them see how it feels:

"Come on Raquita, gimme my cot-d@mn money!"

"Broken ankle? So what! Where's my money!"

"Ma, I paid your @$$ back that money for my humidifier last week! Get off my back!"

"Look grandma, Imma buy your tulips when I feel like it. BE EASY!"

"Girl, if you don't get up and fix my breakfast, Imma..."

"If you push me in this wet spot one more time girl, that's your a$$"

"So what if my toenails cut you! Move out the way then!"

"Look, don't be talking to me this early, you got hellafied morning breath!"

And so on...Let's see how much they love that. I think that's fair, what about you guys?


Lawrenorder said...

*Note to self--Do NOT call Mike 1st thing in the AM*
If you want to get up that early to give the neighbors a taste of thier own medicine be my guest... but doesn't that involve getting up early?

Anonymous said...

Not necessarily. I can still do this late at night if I really want it to have an impact. Because I think what makes people more upset is not being able to go to sleep rather than not being able to stay asleep. But some of my tentative comments DO require an AM wake-up.

Girl from Mango's said...

I think your fake fighting scheme is a REALLY good idea...especially if there isn't anyone fighting with you and if your neigbors know you live alone...cause 1) they'll have problems sleeping cause of the noise and 2) they might think you're schizo and ready to flip at any time, which'll REALLY give them problems sleeping. Ahhh, paranoia...the gift that keeps on giving. If you really get into it, you should fake fight an argument with them really loudly, and answer for them too! Throwing stuff around helps too, I think.

Anonymous said...

"girl from Mango's"...Now that's funny! M-I-M-I-M-I-A!!!!

Throwing stuff around...hmmmmnnnn.

T. Clarke said...

LMAO!!! I can totally relate...I tends to get up and go bang on the door got the point across they think I'm crazy and have turned it down...LOL

oh, and keeping someone from going to sleep like they want to....priceless...

Anonymous said...

Bang on the door? Nah...Gotta walk too far to do that. Then I don't want to start nothing with homie next door b/c I'd hate to have it escalate to something more serious. Band on the wall though...I can do that. Bamas used to do that to me when it wasn't even loud in my crib.