Happy DEVIL'S HOLIDAY!!!

I mean Halloween.

I like to think this is a bit better than my past halloween greetings (watch your back before you click...) (LMMFAO). Anyway, Halloween is a "holiday" that I am pretty much indifferent towards at this age and probably will be until I have some lil crumb-snatching, sugar over-dosing, eat anything a stranger gives you on Halloween KIDS. Currently, the highlight of Halloween for me each year is the party they have at my job from 3pm to 5pm where I do not have to work...Yet I can go upstairs to the Halloween party, grab a Heineken or Sam Adams (courtesy of my employer) and make corny jokes about work with my co-workers that nobody outside of the party room would ever care about or find the least bit humorous. Aside from that, I also garner some weird sort of satisfaction out of deciding how I am going to duck all the little whipper-snappers who come by my door in hopes of getting some candies ("I like dee KANDEEZ!"). I love the kids though :-)

My normal methods of avoidance include making sure I'm not home or cutting off the porch light. And this year will be even more interesting since I have a new place and I HAVE TO BE HOME between 4 and 6pm today because the friggin' Comcast installation guy is coming by. Maybe I should dress up like one of them for Halloween? But more likely than not, this afternoon I will be getting some candy on my way home and helping someone's child cause a ridiculous amount of havoc over the next week as they binge on nothing but sugar-based, energy inducers.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE KIDS and I don't have a problem handing out candy. Just haven't done it in a couple of years because I've been out of town, or just away from the crib (see aforementioned excuses for being a butthole on Halloween).

But I digress. My real aim in this post is to show you some of the best Halloween costumes I could muster from a Google search. Check 'em out:

I could only hope to get this lucky one day...I would definitely give her some candy. That's for sure.


Ever seen a dude with a cameltoe? YUCK!


Sting m RIGHT NOW...PLEASE! Where? Girl I don't give a fugggggggggg?


The walking one-liner.


Is that Ms. Peaches??


LMAO


I'd rather see someone with their pants saggin'...


Spiderman must be COLD


Nasty mutha...


Oooops...That's her NORMAL shyt.


HA haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!


Interesting...


My favorite..."Whatchu doing there boi!?!!" (shot out to Mart-INNNNNNN!)