TRAPPED IN THE CLOSET: Cliff's Notes....

A co-worker forwarded this to me and I thought it was pretty funny. Someone actually took the time to create "Cliff's Notes" of the R. Kelly Trapped in the Closet mini-movies.

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=3100

Here's an exceprt from the Glossary:

Deep shit: A difficult situation.

Y’all ass is crazy: Your entire ass is crazy.

Bitch, please: Used to express disbelief at a woman’s words.

Club hoppin’: Searching for sexual encounters or cheap thrills at nightclubs

I’ma: I am going to

R U A TRUE FRIEND???

We'll see. About 20 seconds ago I realized I had a little piece of eye-crud sitting on my cheek. It was nothing major really, but then I wondered "How long has that been there? I've talked to like 10 people today already and no one said anything!"

DAMN!!!!!! Nobody said any-friggin-thing!

I mean let's be real here...If someone sees you walking around talking and having a good time and there's a big-a$$ piece of eye-crud on your face (or perhaps some dried mucous), wouldn't you want them to tell you so that you can get it off and not continue walking around like that? Man! I know I WOULD!

But NO! Nobody tells me anything. So, this is something I am going to have to add to my list of requirements for being a true friend..."Politely inform me when I have eye-crud, dried snot/mucous, or whatever on my face. This can be extended to stains on my clothing, non-matching socks, open zipper, my lazy eye is pointing the wrong way, etc." But dammit just say something! I can't stand it when I realize something like this after half a day at work. Because you KNOW people have seen it already and just ignored it! Don't ignore it, let me know. I won't mind, trust me! This is my PLEA! Ignore it on everyone else but not MOI!

NFL: Let's see if they can get this right...

This year in the NFL you've got several guys who are worthy candidates for NFL coach of the year. Here's my list (not in order of precedence):

Tony Dungy (Indianapolis Colts)...Took his team to 13 straight wins. That's enough to be considered coach of the year. The team probably could have gone undefeated in the regular season if Tony's son James had not passed away (RIP James Dungy).

Lovie Smith (Chicago Bears)...The Bears have totally sucked the past few years (actually, it seems more like decades) and Lovie Smith comes in and turns this team back into a hard-nosed, pounding football team. They're built on a great defense and an offense that can get just enough done to win (sort of like the 2000 Ravens). And Lovie Smith makes sure his guys play hard every week of the season. Nobody thought they would be where they are right now (#2 seed in the NFC) considering what people expected Philly to do this year.

Marvin Lewis (Cincinatti Bengals)...The Bengals are 11-4. Don't really need to say much more than that! Last year I think they finished 8-8...Which is like the Bucanneers of the 80's going 14-2! This year they go 12-4, possibly. That's a TREMENDOUS improvement. Personally, Marvin gets my vote. But I'm a Redskins fan (he used to coach in DC) and I live in Baltimore (he used to coach in Bmore). But even moreso than that, I like Chad Johnson's TD celebrations.

Bill Belichick (New England Patriots)...Even with all their injuries the Pats somehow manage to make the playoffs and will most likely take out one of your favorite AFC teams in round one. I have never been a fan of the Patriots, much like I've never been a fan of the Lakers of the NBA. But I know two things...You gotta respect Bellichick and Brady just like you gotta respect Phil and Kobe. Because they know how to get it done and they'll fight their hearts out trying to win. Gotta respect that. The Patriots seem to be peaking right around playoff time which has to be a great thing for coach Bellichick but a horrifying thing for the Colts. We all know the Colts history in the playoffs against the Pats and it wouldn't surprise me if they did it again this year.

Notables left off: Mike Holmgren (Seattle has perenially underachieved...It's about time); Mike Shanahan (Denver will be gone in the playoffs first round); Nick Saban (even though Miami sucks, they're above .500 which I know I didn't expect); and Mike Tice (he's big, he's kinda lame at times, but his team responded toward the latter part of the season).

Now to the more fun part of this...The wackest coaches in the NFL. I won't really dwell too much on why, but I'll give a little on each guy.

1 - Marty Schottenheimer...How do you lose with a team like that?
2 - Brian Billick...Though I don't want to talk bad about the Ravens right now because I picked them to win this week in my survivor pool...He sucks.
3 - Mike Tice...Odd that he makes both lists huh?
4 - Dom Capers...Can we say "lame duck"?
5 - Bill Parcells...Retire, PLEASE! I don't like your attitude mister!!!!
6 - Bill Cowher...I'm tired of hearing anything about the Steelers...They're not going to win a championship
7 - Norv Turner...The man looks like a turkey. Nuff said!

PHOTOS: Christmas Lights...

After an eventful weekend filled with trips to a Christmas party T's classmate was having, attending Levar and Tyra's wedding (where I got to see Lauren and Kaisha who is always missing in action), a Sunday night dinner with T, an exam, a presentation, and a written report, Monday brought about a Limo ride to Sandy Point State Park to see their Christmas lights show. Naturally, there were lots of libations and "water being turned into wine" on the ride up to honor my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Man, cheap wine is GREAT!!!

Here are some pics below...The "T is Santa" shots, and the "No matter where black folk go they find a way to turn it into a hand-clapping party" shot.

PHOTOS: Congratulations LeVar and Tyra...

December 17, 2005. LeVar and Tyra MARRIED!

This has been years in the making (ain't that right LeVar). Congratulations to you both! You are both great people and you definitely deserve one-another. I won't wish you guys luck because I know you don't need it! I have a couple pics up from the wedding below:

The Chappelle Theory

I know I'm probably late on this, but I'll post it anyway:

http://www.chappelletheory.com/

REDSKINS 35...COWBOYS 7!!!

Bored At Work: AVATAR TIME!!!!

Okay, so I was bored at work Friday and I decided to create a Yahoo! Avatar of myself. This actually turned out to be pretty tight.

I've got a couple examples below. They're as close to my appearance as possible (using the Avatar features they have). There aren't really an abundant amount of items that black folks wear. And a lot of the things there are definitely not the way black folks would wear them. But it's still nice to be able to create a virtual version of yourself. I'm sure they'll incorporate more African-American culture into the designs at some point.

Examples of my Avatar:

This one's the Fall Foilage Miguel:



This one's the Seasonably Warm Miguel:



In the Avatar interface it's more animated though, which is pretty cool. I'm thinking Yahoo! is gonna spin this feature of their Yahoo! accounts into an online version of the Sims. That would be pretty cool and interesting (to me at least).

Minnesota Vikings Sex Boat...

LMAO! I'm sorry, I can't even read the title without laughing to myself.

Anyway, in case you haven't already heard about the Minnesota Vikings sex boat scandal (LOL, there I go again), here is an article about it (read up)!

Here's the real JUICE though:

"Fred Smoot: Was seen holding a double-headed dildo and moving the dildo while each end was inserted into the vagina of two women who were lying on the floor near the lounge area of the charter boat. After a period of time, one of the women got up and Mr. Smoot continued to manipulate the dildo inside the other woman.

Daunte Culpepper: Got a "lap dance" from an unidentified, naked female. During this "lap dance," Mr. Culpepper placed his hands on the naked buttocks of the female dancer.

Moe Williams: [Williams is witnessed] in the area by the downstairs bathrooms receiving a "lap dance," which involved the "dancer" dancing bare-breasted and Mr. Williams with his hands on and touching the breasts of his female partner.

Bryant McKinnie: [McKinnie is witnessed] pick up a naked woman, place her on the bar in the lounge and commence to perform oral sex on her. ... At a different time during the evening, [witnesses] saw Mr. McKinnie along with three other unidentified males receiving oral sex from four women while the men were seated in deck chairs on the boat."

The gist of it...A bunch of Vikings players (up to 30, from what i have heard) when on this boat cruise and there were strippers on the boat and the players participated in lude and lacivious acts with the strippers.

Maybe I've just been exposed to too many things in my life, but isn't this how strip clubs work? At least it's how 3 out of the 5 strip clubs I have been to in my lifetime appeared to work. Although a lot of people probably won't believe this (why they won't, I'm not sure) I'm not too fond of strip clubs.

So this morning I'm watching Sportscenter and I hear that Daunte Culpeper (QB), Fred Smoot (CB), and Brian McKinney (OT), and Moe Williams (RB) are being charged with misdemeanor crimes for their participation in this sex boat scandal (LOL). And the sound byte from the officer/lawyer citing the charges read (and I paraphase here):

"Brian McKinney participated in giving AND receiving oral sex and has been charge..."

Okay, so dude's a FREAK! Actually, this is probably normal for most people (ya'll don't want to admit it though)...And homeboy gets charged a misdemeanor for it??!!! This is illegal? WTF?

Let's think about how many people we all know would be thrown under the jail if this were truly a crime that we could all be charged with. I mean damn! Think about Monica Lewinsky. And she's but one example! Man, that charge made the entire situation even more hilarious to me. I guess we all need to remember that if we have sex, it should be safe...And it should also be legal sex if you're in the state of Minnesota!

Minnesota...A state of legal sex and also formerly governed by Jesse "The Body" Ventura...A former professional wrestler!!! His nickname is "The Body"...Come on guys, you've got to see the humor in all of this! I know I'm corny and all, but illegal sex in a state taht used to be governed by a guy nicknamed "The Body". This is some classic sh^t! I mean, it would be more classic if he were still governor, but it's still funny since I didn't figure that out until halfway through writing this paragraph...Classic like Whitney saying "Crack is wack!" on national TV.

I love it!

My skin color for yours...We can swap it out!

Taken from http://www.sohh.com/articles/article.php/7993. I gotta catch this!

"Cube explores racism with new TV show. "Black. White," a new FX reality TV show produced by Ice Cube and filmmaker R.J. Cutler is set to explore race issues by making black and white couples trade skin color. With the help of Oscar-nominated make up artist Keith VanderLean, the black couple transforms into a white pair and vice versa. In the six-part series, the two couples, a black family (Sparks) from Atlanta and a white family (Wurgels) from Santa Monica also live and interact with each other for two months. The families are sent out into the world with new identities to experience life from the perspective of another race. The show is slated to premiere in March 2006."

Soundtrack of My Life...

What is the soundtrack of your life? This question was posed by my buddy Lauren on her BLOG. I thought this was a very interesting and thought-provoking question. If I had to make a soundtrack of my life, what would be on it? Who would I leave off? What CDs, songs, artists rode that emotional rollercoaster with me over the years. Who got me hype and siced me? Who helped me through the tough times with my girlfriend(s)? Who made me want to go and break a nukka's neck?

Well, I gave it a quick 5-minute think through, and here what I came up with thus far. I am sure I'll be adding to this as time goes on...


Tribe Called Quest & Anything Wu Tang - Middle School

Biggie, Nas, and Pac - Early High school

Devin the Dude, Scarface, Rare Essence (go-go band), UGK - Junior/Senior Years of High School

Scarface, Jay-Z, Outkast - Freshman Year of College

Anything Rocafella, Erykah Badu, Maxwell, Anything Cash Money - Sophomore and Junior Years of College

State Property CD #1, Jay-Z, Christion, Dave Hollister, Jill Scott,Erykah Badu, Vivian Green, Alicia Keys - Senior Year of College

Kanye West, Freeway, Alicia Keys, Jaheim, Beanie Sigel, T.I., GAME, KEM, Raphael Saadiq, John Legend, Vivian Green, Jay-Z, Kindred, Anthony Hamilton, goapele, Young Jeezy, Lyfe - Since college graduation in 2002 until now

It's hard to say "this is it, nothing else" because I have listened to so many different CDs and songs. Also, I have listened to different genres, but they have not had the impact that these have, or should I say, they haven't had the rotation. It's interesting just to sit back and think about all those moments you had in life and what you may have been listening to during that moment, right before, or right after. Not to mention what you had in heavy rotation in your CD player or tape deck back then.

ULTIMATE HUSTLA

For those of you who are like me and are addicted to reality TV shows on both BET and MTV, you may have seen the "Grande Finale" of the BET's Ultimate Hustla last night. This show isn't really all that good, but it's pretty entertaining watching all these people run around and try to please Dame Dash.

Dame alone is pretty entertaining by himself. I mean, I have fun just counting how many times he says "pause" when he talks so that he doesn't sound "soft" or gay. Aside from that, just the way Dame speaks in general is pretty entertaining. His pronunciations and facial expressions are pretty funny.

Since the show's over, I'll just drop some of my opinions abou the show:

1. Rachel Roy...I like her. I won't hate on Dame anymore than I already have for getting with a woman like Rachel. She's badd!

2. I like the fact that Dame isn't afraid to claim his wife and show the world he's a hip-hop mogul, but also a "husband" (yes, the quotes are necessary) and that he actually does have a wife that he claims in the publi eye. I mean, why not claim HER!

3. Dashawn should have kept his hat on at all times because those braids...Wheww!

4. Brian, the winner, was pretty on point with his "hustle", but I think he tried too hard at times to be "hip-hop" and he sounded kinda corny (to me at least). Especially in the last few shows when he was feeling himself.

5. Ray IS the TRUE hustler on that show! If you noticed, he and Brian have talked about Brian's pitch to Dame and I am sure that Ray's gonna get in on that action somehow and make some bread using Brian's idea.

6. How did Tichanda (howeveryouspellthatish) make it THAT far? I expected it to be Brian, Dashawn, and Ray. But Ray's real "around-the-way" hustler side came out too early and too often.

7. Deep down I was hoping that Kira would win.

8. BIGG's actually talks!

9. Dame has a lot of connections in the business, but will he really be able to remain on that level that he was on when the ROC was on top?

10. Dashawn had the tightest idea to pitch.

11. Does the winner actually get to make money off his idea or was the point of the show just to see how much money they could make Dame?

And if you think I'm boring or not talkative enough, read someone else's opinion.

Terminator determines Tookie's Fate...

We already know Ahhhhhnold's decision has been made. But I'm not going to give my opinion on this...Imma just ask a couple questions:

1. Is it not ironic that the man who played the Terminator in 3 movies gets to determine whether or not Tookie Williams lives or dies? What did we really think would be the outcome?

2. What really makes Arnold (or any of us for that matter) qualified to determine whether another man lives or dies? I mean, how was Arnold even qualified enough to become governor? Man, where's Ariana Huffington?

PHOTOS: R U READY for some FOOTBALL!!!!

This past Saturday, the fellas all got together to play some good ole football! Imagine 17 of us together trying to play football! You know it's gonna be a time to remember. Check out some of the pictures below (shot out to L for sending me these pictures)...Oh yeah, and know that the score was 42-7 (or was it 49?). I won't say who won though ;-)

Thanks to everybody who came out!!! We gotta get another game in once the weather breaks in the spring.

LOL: Excedrine for Racial Tension Headaches

This must have been from Saturday Night Live. I am not sure though. Thanks for sending me this Tiff.

WTF: T-PAIN, PAUL WALL

What is wrong with this picture...???...??? And why do I feel disgusted when I look at it? OMG!

Next up...Enjoy people, enjoy!



LMMFAO!

The most exciting moment in the Hopkins/Taylor Fight...

Considering that the fight was pretty much boring as hell...AND Taylor won the fight when it should have went to Hopkins (but that's up for argument, I know)...The most exciting part of the entire broadcast, for me, was R. Kelly's "step-i-fied" rendition of our national anthem! LMAO!

I am not the MOST patriotic person in the world, but I understand the significance of the Star Spangled Banner. I mean, it was written right here in Bodymore, Murdaland at Fort McHenry by Francis Scott Key. Shot out to T for dropping that knowledge on me!

I understand that I am SUPPOSED to stand and put my hand over my heart when this song is played/sung. I don't always do that, but at the very least, I have the respect to keep my mouth shut and treat the song as a significant 2 minutes of time and respect the fact that it's being sung.

I also understand that you're not supposed to BUTCHER the song by turning into a rock-n-roll song, a hip-hop song, or anything other than what it is! Whitney Houston performed (hands-down, not argument) the greatest rendition of the Star Spangled Banner years ago at a Superbowl...Not sure which one, but she killed the song. This leads me to Mr. Kelly's rendition last night!

R. Kelly turned the Star Spangled Banner into "Step in the name of love!" Not only did he speed up the song as if that would actually make it sound better, but he even had two couples hand-dancing in the ring while he sang!!! This violates so many traditions it's ridiculous! I am surprised he didn't get booed more than he did after it was over.

Now, I jokingly stated "Man, he bout to do chapter 12 [of his hip-hopera's]!" But I had no idea he would do what he did. It was COMPLETELY hilarious to me. I mean, he couldn't have done anything sillier than to take a song that the entire nation knows is meant to be sang one way and one way only, and turn it into a song that sounds like it was on his last album! It was a classic moment in boxing history for me and I am sure that there were lots of people around the country pissed about it!

Fellas, GOT GAME?

Sure you do...But not as much as Smoove B!

Freshman 15

This is pretty funny! Good look on this one Puto!

She eeeeeeeeeeeats my chocolate!

FRESHMAN 15

Hip-Hop = HELL???

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed on the website listed below are not those of the blogger presenting them to you (that's ME, people). They are the opinions/beliefs of the bama that's giving them. ENJOY!

Resa G., this is VERY interesting and thought-provoking stuff!

www.exministries.com

----Elder Lewis

Be sure to click onto the links entitled:
-The Vision

-The Watch: scroll to the bottom and click enter to read about certain artists whose lyrics he's pointing out

-The Argument

SAW II

T and I saw this yesterday (in the afternoon mind you, because a certain person was a lil scared) and I thought it was a decent movie. It wasn't as good as the first one, but it was pretty entertaining. If you're afraid of blood, torture, and twisted thoughts, this movie IS NOT for you! I give this one a 3 out of 5.

The Fiddy Movie

I must say that after sitting through "Get Rich or Die Tryin'" last night I am quite impressed with the movie. There are no Oscar-worthy performances (although Terrence Howard's performace was great) but overall, the movie was pretty good. 50 didn't over-do it with his attempt at being a thespian, and they didn't over-do it with the gangster-izm. And they even managed to create a decent story.

Aside from the somewhat unrealistic scenarios in terms of the beefs between 50's crew and the Columbian cats and the shower scene, I was pleased. I liked the movie a lot and I would recommend that if you are a fan of 50 or just a hip-hop fan, it's worth going to see and it's worth the price of admission.

Now that I've given praise to the film, I have to pose a few questions/comments:

1. How much of this story is really truth? I think 50 said in an interview like 75%, but I find that hard to believe

2. Was the dude named JuneBug being played by Mike Jones? WHO?????

3. The shower scene...M&therf*ck#r for WHAT? Ladies, I hope you enjoy(ed) it!

4. Joy Bryant is cute and attractive, but not as BAD as everybody has been sicing her up to be.

5. Where were Tony Yayo and Lloyd Banks? I know 50 had his crew in the film, but I can't imagine those guys were supposed to be Yayo or Banks.

6. Why does Majestic have the same netted shirt on the first 3 times you see him in the movie? And those appearances span like 10 years?

7. How do you think Irv, Ja (who is mocked in the movie via the character Dangerous), and Supreme feel about this film?

I musta hadda blessin' from Pastah Ma$on..

Somebody tell me you'd go to church on Sunday after your pastor spit this rhyme...

Ma$on Betha spits HOT FIRE! (Windows Media File)

"I feel I'm God with the flow cuz people started believin" - Chaundon

New word I learned today...Euthanized

Euthanized...Which means to be subject to euthanasia...Which is "The act or practice of ending the life of an individual suffering from a terminal illness or an incurable condition, as by lethal injection or the suspension of extraordinary medical treatment."

Essentially this means getting "put to sleep". So being euthanized means getting "put to sleep".

"MIKE, YOU BE LUNCHIN'!!!"

I'm officially convinced that I am either dyslexic, retarded, "spread to thin", or just plain stupid.

Examples:

Dyslexic - I transpose numbers frequently. And I know most of you are reading saying to yourself, "I do that too sometimes". Yeah, sure you do that sometimes. But I do it all the time. How often do you mix up the last 4 digits of someone's phone number? Not daily I bet! Moreover, if I'm looking at mapquest directions, I quite often mix up the exit number (and letter if it exists) with the actual road I'm traveling on. Let's say I'm going south on I-95 to exit 98B...My route wil be I-98 to exit 95B. I'M DYSLEXIC!

Retarded - Oftentimes, I find myself fumbling through normal conversation with people. For example, how can I come to work and start a conversation with a person I've had ten billion conversations with before and forget how to speak? That's mental retardation! And it's more than just not being able to put what you want to say into words. It's a lack of knowing which words go together. This is only temporary (let's hope) but DAYUM! I'M RETARTED!

"Spread too thin" - I'm sure all of you have been told at some point in life that you shouldn't spread yourself too thin. That applies to me right now I think. Let's see...There's work, school, small business, organizing get-togethers, outings with friends, planning Thanksgiving dinner with my mom, reading while listening to music (try that one), blogging, listening to ideas that friends have for starting their businesses...That's all I can think of. Just call me Peanut Buttah! I'M SPREAD TOO THIN!

Stupid - BHill or L can vouch for how stupid I am. L has a much more recent example though. Let's just say...When everybody's got a secret they're trying to keep from someone, I lack the ability to send an email to everyone "in" on the secret without sending the secret to the person it's being kept from. Uhhhh, you guessed it...I'M STUPID!

I'm giving you all the opportunity to tell me exactly why I am one of the four aforementioned items....Feel free...

I'm Sorry Ms. Jackson...

Oops, I mean Mr. Jackson...



"Tea? Tea? Dog, that ain't gangsta!!" - Cedric the Entertainer (Be Cool)

T and I are going to catch Get Rich or Die Trying tonight. I have heard pretty good reviews for it and I'm looking forward to seeing it.

You shocked are going to shock a lot of people with this picture though...LMAO!

Thanksgiving

This year, Thanksgiving's taking place at MY HOUSE! Wow! I've been thinking about doing this the past few years and finally it's actually going down. Now, for all of you wondering who's going to be cooking...I can assure you it won't be me poisoning my own family. Besides, the only thing(s) I cook well are:

• chicken (fried or baked)
  
• spaghetti
  
• salmon
  

Anything else that I cook is pretty much a shot-in-the-dark. Maybe it'll turn out good, maybe it won't...It's your call.

So anyway, I am looking forward to this since my brother and I are holding down the spot right now. So it'll be like moving 4-7-1-6 to 6 Merk. It's a beautiful thing!

In case you care, here are some things I'll be thinking about while eating on Thanksgiving:

• "Why are people making such a big deal out of the Young Jeezy snowman t-shirts?" I've been to Patapsco flea market and seen shirts with GUNS ON THEM! Why are we worrying about a snowman picture? It's the "snow" we should be worrying about! Say no to drugs everyone.
  
• "Why did the Redskins lose to Oakland? I'm pissed"
  
• "Why do I always have to sit through a damn Detroit and Cowboys game on Thanksgiving?" At least I understand why they won't be showing any "redskins" games on Thanksgiving! "There will never be peace on stolen land..."
  
• "Man, I know Walmart is gonna be packed like sardines when I get there tomorrow morning at 5am! They better have the cute cashiers working!"
  
• "Can I possibly save enough food to eat through Saturday night?"
  
• "Damn Cad can cook his a$$ off!"
  
• "I hope the Cowgals lose by 50 points!"
  
• "I'll be glad when winter's over."
  
• I wonder what all my friends are doing and if they're gonna be selfish and not invite me over to wherever they are and feast with them. Suckas!
  
• I hope none of my web development clients call or email me before Sunday.
  

Things I WON'T be thinking about while eating on Thanksgiving:

• Work
  
• School work
  
• How much it's gonna cost to get the leak in my car's sunroof fixed
  
• The price of gas
  
• How I am gonna be pressed to blog about Thanksgiving again on Monday
  

PHOTOS: Wizards Lose, but I WIN when it comes to GREAT trips...

Even though Lebron dropped 37 on the Wizards, I had a wonderful time in Cleveland. The only thing that could have made this trip better was if the Wizards actually came out with a win.

But from the niceness of the people in the city to the hotel upgrade to a suite (for free) to the cheap drinks ($3.95 for a Ciroc and pineapple)...Cleveland's a wonderful place. I can't say enough about how nice the people of Cleveland were. So nice that I had to email my friend Brandi (who was born in Cleveland) and tell her how nice I thought the people in her city were and how much I like the city.

In comparison to people in other cities I've visited (I will refrain from naming them), the people in Cleveland were pretty much the nicest. Kudos to the wonderful people of Cleveland with their west-coast-sounding accents and kind demeanors.

I have some pictures from the trip below. We spent most of our time eating, drinking, and even went to a lil club (where the DJ was CRANKIN') after the game.

For some reason, the pictures seem to show up WAYYYYY below this text so you'll have to scroll down to see them.

Eating before the game....

Shot from the stands:

B sleep at the game...LMAO!

This is a HUGE billboard Nike has of Lebron on the side of a building right by the arena. IT'S HUGE!

Me and my Larry Huges (LOL) bobblehead:

That's a Joke, Right?

Okay, now that I've got your attention...

I'm wondering you guy's thoughts on this...

http://sportspickle.com/features/volume3/2003-1119-daly.html

I'm particularly interested in hear non-Black people's thoughts on this article. It's website of sports satire, but (for me personally) while there's an odd humor to this story there is also a maddening offensiveness to it as well, considering, I'M BLACK!

This further goes to prove that point that someone (I can't remember who, but it was a comedian) said (and I paraphrase here) something to the effect of how SOME white people might try to talk like us, dress like us, rap like us, etc. But they wouldn't trade anything in the world to actually be BLACK LIKE US!

I'm not trying to offend anyone here, I am just expressing my feelings as a black man. Granted, this whole article is definitely a joke... But you know how sometimes you make a quip or a quickly jovial comment that really has some truth behind it? Yeah, I do that too! So don't act like we shouldn't pay attention to "funny" articles like this.

Some may say I lack a sense of humor off the strength of this entry but oh well...

YES!

Turn your volume down...

http://mike.webic.biz/videos/yes.wmv

25 Hours from now...Cleveland...

Around this time tomorrow I'll be close to landing in Cleveland. Hiwoo, me, BHill going to see the Wizards (my favorite team) take on the Cavaliers (Lebron is my favorite player) at Quicken Loans Arena.

I'm rooting for the Wizards to win of course, but I hope Lebron gets his rocks off! We'll see.

As usual, I will have some flicks to post when I return from my trip!

I love me some Queen Latifah...

...I just realized...Okay, I just accepted that like 37 seconds ago after watching the trailer linked-to below. She stays doing something big-time in entertainment and does it with class. I like the way she carries herself..."Who you calling a b&tch!?!!!" That's for everybody who remembers U-N-I-T-Y!

Even with all the rumors floating around about her sexuality, she's doing her thing! So WHO CARE'S???

The Last Holiday

Good look Tiff for sending me this trailer!

PIMPIN', PIMPIN', PIMPIN'...

Just wanted to share this clip of Katt Williams (better known as Money Mike) with everyone in case you didn't catch it. Shot out to Rah for sending this one to me. It's a Windows Media File...Enjoy!

Proof God Exists

I got this from Tiff and it's pretty deep. I'm sure (as usual) I am late on the email forwards but I figured I'd share this one regardless.

------------------------
This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen. It's an explanation other people will understand.

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and various subjects.

When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe that God exists."

"Why do you say that?" asked the customer.

"Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things."

The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.

The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop. Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:

"You know what? Barbers do not exist."

"How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!"

"No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."

"Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is, people do not come to me."

"Exactly!"- Affirmed the customer. "That's the point! ! God, too, DOES exist! What happens, is, people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."

JarHead

Let me first say that I was pretty excited to see this movie. Jamie Foxx is in it, they used my man Kanye's music in the trailer. Man! I'm pumped. Then T and I go to my sister's party this past Saturday and one of my sister's friends says that it was "okay...It's not a war movie, it's a movie about the build-up of going to war. There's no real fighting in it."

I listed to him, but I didn't really pay that last part ("There's no real fighting in it") too much attention. I figured it'd still be an interesting movie and that Jamie Foxx could make up for any lack of blood-spattering and AK-47 rounds going off.

T and I and I went to see it last night and I CANNOT RECOMMEND this movie to anyone who is a "civilian". The movie is interesting in that it gives you some insight into the life of a Marine and what it's probably like in their world. But as a civilian who's pretty much anti-"fight-for-America", I was disappointed that there wasn't very much action in this movie AT ALL. It has more of a documentary feel to it than anything else, if you ask me. Jamie Foxx did his thing and so did Jake whatever-his-name-is.

But in the end, I left the movie theatre a little disappointed. T liked it, but that's pretty normal for us. LOL. Then again, maybe it was all the male genitalia and bare buttocks that she liked.

Anywho, overall, I'd have to give this movie a rating of 3 on a scale of 1-5. It's a movie that I'd recommend you wait to rent rather than pay money to see, unless you go to a matinee. But full price? Hell to the NAW! Shot out to Bobby and Whitney..."When I say bobby you say Brown...Bobby..."

LMAO! I'm out!

It's official, I can't say "snitch" anymore...

Now that the media's got a hold of it and they're starting to talk about it, I am pretty sure it's gonna go the way of the term "bling-bling". Meaning, I am going to hear people using it b/c they think it sounds cool.

And after taking another look at this article, since when is not snitching a code of hip-hop and not a code of the street? This applies to the mafia as well. Don't snitch! Duh! So, anyway, I am not really supporting this stop snitching campaign b/c I think it's kind of dumb. But I am bothered when the media gets ahold of things and just turns terminlogy and slang into cliché's. That irritates me.

Anyway, feel free to leave your thoughts on this.

Am I the only person tired of...

rappers not paying child support? First I hear about Young Jeezy not paying and now Beanie Sigel. What's the deal fellas? This gets on my nerves because I assume (like most people do) that rappers have the money to pay their child support. I am not going to believe that all rappers have what they say they have in regards to their material possession and money, but come on! They have to have at least the $184 (in the state of MD for example) per month to pay their child support.

In general, not paying your child support is just wack to me anyway. It's really no excuses for it. But to hear about rappers not paying just makes me upset.

CELEBRITY STUNT-DOUBLES: I can't take this sh^t no mo!

I am officially tired of all the celebrity comparisons that I have to deal with. I mean, I know all tall, skinny, light-skindeded black males look the same, but jeez! If you know me, you should know better.

For those of you who are wondering, here's the people I get compared to:

#1 - Swizz Beats. This one used to piss me off, but I am starting to accept it now. And that a blip!







#2 - Grant Hill. That's fine. And so is his wife. ;-) It's the ears I guess.







#3 - Joe Budden. Where this one comes from, I have no idea whatesoever!







#4 - Common. NO COMMENT







#5 - Boris Kodjoe...Sike nah, got ya'll a$$e$...LOL. "Don't be HATIN!"

FUNNY: That boy Fred Mar strikes again!!!

I think he's gonna make himself famous with these videos of him singing!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1736976751768330821&q=Fred+Mar

HILARIOUS!

You gotta watch this video! Dude is HILARIOUS!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1483126109004145166&q=fred+marshall+karaoke

FIRST: MEN dance together in the club???

This is another interesting thing I noticed last night while in the club. The event taking place was a hip-hop party. Basically a Sunday night party that's supposed to be like a Friday night party. Dancing, drinking, hip-hop, reggae, etc.

Last night however, for the first time, I saw two men dancing together in the club. And not just dancing face-to-face, but dancing like you see guys dancing with girls in the club...Like the CLIPSE..."GRINDIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!" This disturbed me at first. No one seemed to pay it any mind though. I was kinda shocked. But after continuing to dance and just mind my own damn business, I realized it didn't bother me as much as I assumed it would.

Some of you may be questioning why this would even bother me in the first place. If you are, STOP LUNCHING! I'm a grown-ass man! Grown ass men don't dance like that with other grown ass men. I will admit a slight homophobia but I like to think that I am more open-minded than a lot of men in general. And last night helped me become a little bit more comfortable in the presence of openly gay men. While it pretty much makes my stomach turn to see something like that, I think I am now better equiped to handle such a sight! Wheww, that was tough!

Anyway, this was a kinda important moment in my battle against this slight homophobia I have. Now, for the record, DO NOT expect me to completely loose this homophobia. It's not gonna happen! Every man should have some, I believe. But I am becoming a little bit more comfortable and accepting of men who live that lifestyle, even though I don't agree with it.

And I admit that I am a complete hyprocrite and uphold an unbelievable double-standard when it comes to women dating other women versus men dating men. Why don't I mind women-dating-women? Ask a guy...He'll tell you! I think deep down, all men have that bit of confidence in them that says "Even though she likes girls, you still got a shot homie!" Perhaps that's why?

I know this blog entry could cause some negative feedback towards me, but oh well, I had to put this out there.

Laffy Taffy song...again...

Okay, so I was in the club last night having a decent time. Doing my lil 1-2 step (shot out to Ciara) and screaming all the Young Jeezy ad-libs you can think of. Then, all of a sudden, I hear "the dumbest song" I've heard in quite some time (for the second time).

Now, I was interested in seeing how the crowd would react to this horrendous song! Hilarious, yet horrendous! Would they do like me and go "I can't believe they're playing this bama-a$$ song" and walk off the dancefloor? Would they begin tossing their drinks in the direction of the DJ? I was really interested in seeing the crowds reaction...

So about 2.5 seconds into the daggon lyrics of the song (because it starts off with that old Nintendo sound for like 10 seconds) the crowd goes wild! NEEDLESS TO SAY, I WAS SHOCKED! Could not believe my eyes. I couldn't do anything but laugh. I guess I am the ONLY person who won't dance to this songs under any circumstances. Now by circumstances in this case, I mean drunk or sober. At a club or at a house-party (damn, when's the last time I was at a good house party?). While watching the video or hearing it on the radio. I think the song is pretty silly. I won't continue to complain like I did in my previous blog entry. But I had to share this experience with the world.

NFL Math

Eagles-T.O. + Redskins + FedEx Field = Redskins WIN

A win's a win!

I'M PISSED

This is some disrespectful -ish to do. I don't want to call it racist. But there's something VERY VERY wrong with this situation. Not a surprise that it's in Texas.


"6. Thug Day in Dallas High School. Students at Dallas, Texas' Highland Park High School dressed as gang members and rap stars during the recent Homecoming week. Meanwhile, a Dallas Civil Rights leader called the tradition racially insensitive. One of Homecoming's themes was Senior Thug Day, a day on which students sported Afro wigs, fake gold teeth, baggy jeans, bandanas and gold chains. For Fiesta Day, a student brought a leaf blower to school mocking hispanics. According to school principal Patrick Cates, no one was punished and less than a dozen students were asked to take off some of the clothing. Helen Williams, the District Communications Director, said 18 students were sent to the principal's office for inappropriate attire during Thug Day. No students were reprimanded on Fiesta Day. Students feel Thug Day was blown out of proportion and that they weren't being racists, but simply having fun."

Then again, Imma go ahead and call it RACIST!

This is taken from this URL (bottom of page):

http://www.sohh.com/articles/article.php/7787

What I wonder is the racial make-up of the student body because I want to assume that these are not black folks b/c we wouldn't mock ourselves like that. And we wouldn't mock Mexicans like that either. But I don't want to str8 up assume b/c that as gotten me in trouble before. But I don't believe that black people would do that and I am highly disappointed if that's the case.

Some shyt just ain't funny! This is my "just-got-finished" reading response. After it marinates I might feel a little different but we'll see.

20 things I learned from the "BET 25 Show last" night...

#1 - Alicia Keys song Unbreakable is my sh&t!

#2 - Mary J. Blige is the BOMB! From her "bop" while she's performing and ad-libbing to her soufoul singing, the girl is BAD! And she's got that FLYY swagger!

#3 - I know every Earth, Wind & Fire song ever made. I'm convinced. I must thank my mother for this because I KNOW she was playing this in the car and around the house while I was younger and it's forever embedded in my brain. Besides, "I'm a shining star!"

#4 - Bob Johnson's daughter...yep, I said it...She's young, but she's kinda cute. Please, STOP all your R. Kelly jokes ahead of time. I'm just pointing out what YOU WERE THINKING.

#5 - Bobby Brown entertains the HELL out of me! "When I say Bobby, you say Brown!"

#6 - I need to start listening to more gospel music

#7 - Donnie Simpson is the most suave and debonair man on the earth..."Yeah I know I still got it baby, I'm just trying to figure out why they still want it!"

#8 - I ain't afraid to admit that at 25 years of age, I think Bow Wow is COOL.

#9 - R. Kelly had some bomb ass songs! Before AND after the allegations.

#10 - LL Cool J is a bad dude! I got a lot of respect for him as an entertainer.

#11 - The HITS dude is hilarious! He needs to come back to BET regularly.

#12 - Ananda Lewis is a DIME!

#13 - Regardless of how you feel about Bob Johnson, he gave black folks a HUGE opportunity and a HUGE resource when he started BET

#14 - Black people are beautiful! Not that other people aren't, but it's such a wonderful thing when black people come together and have a good time.

#15 - Paul Wall gets wider every time I see him

#16 - I want a damn removable grill for my mouth! LMAO!

#17 - Nelly's on steroids! But his new song is dope.

#18 - I believe the rumors about Johnny Gill. All that's missing is a lil narcotic cocktail from all those Johnny Gill-Murphy stories

#19 - Rachel still got it...Caribbean Rhythms!!!

#20 - I'm tryna be present at the BET 50 show.

VIDEO: Jay-Z & Friends...

Somebody got some footage with a digital camera...

http://55broad.video.blip.tv/MissInfo-jayzAndNas406.MPG

Burned-OUT celebs...

One Christopher Williams look-a-like...One recovering crackhead. And one down-low bruh recovering from crack as well....Ladies and gentleman, I introduce to you...

Al B. Sure, K.C., and Tevin Campbell!

Okay, ya'll tell me that K.C. and Tevin don't look like one of your drunk crackhead uncles!!! Damn sure a ringer for one of mine!

Pictures from the Jay-Z Powerhouse Concert

Puffy sure does like that fur coat

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

LMMFAO!



"...jeans look like they painted on..."

KING James...We're on our way...

Cleveland...November 15...Cavaliers VS Wizards! Time for a day-trip to Cleveland!

Shot out to Hiwoo and BHill (we travel in packs)!

If ANYBODY has any friends in Cleveland who can tell us some nice spots to hit on a Tuesday night (restaurant, lounge, etc)...PLEASE let me know!

SPORTS FANS: Frank Caliendo is TOO DAMN FUNNY

I saw this guy on the Best DAMN Sports Show last night and I almost died of laughter.

http://www.frankcaliendo.com/

PHOTOS: Jay-Z, Nas...This is MORE THAN MUSIC

Jay-Z and Nas UNITE!

Honestly, I don't need to give a summary of my thoughts on this...Everybody knows how I feel.

This is bigger than hip-hop to me. It shows that two popular and powerful black men can squash a beef and come together. And the money they're gonna end up making off squashing the beef was probably hella-motivation (yes, I said HELLA!)

"Stop thinking we local come-on homie WE MAJOR!"

Rosa Parks

She will lie in state in Washington, D.C. at the Lincoln Memorial from 6pm to midnight on Sunday.

http://www.detnews.com/2005/specialreport/0510/28/A01-363217.htm

More likely than not, I won't be able to make it because I have a midterm due on Monday and a TON of work-related stuff to finish, but this is definitely a historic moment for all of America, and not just African Americans.

2Nite's the Night like Betty Wright...

Okay, so tonight is the Jay-Z (your favorite rapper's favorite "retired" rapper) Powerhouse concert in NJ. Tomorrow night in Philly (damn I wish I could have got those tickets). Anyway, rumor has it that...

"This is the big day, everybody. I know some aren’t even motivated to know whats going on tonight at the “I Declare War” New York Powerhouse Concert with Jay-Z and Friends, but I have gotten the rumors. I pierced the Def Jam walls to get the scoop from within “the building.” Don’t quote me – I ain’t saying nothing. Anyway, I heard that Jay is going after 50 Cent – not Game, not Dame and not Jim and Cam’ron. Now, on top of this, rumor has it that Jay-Z will be joined by an all-star coalition of supporters (hint: enemies of 50 & G-Unit). I’m not going to mention the names of the people that I heard are now down with Jay, but lets say that a lot of beef was squashed for this to happen – if its going down. Honestly, I have a hard time believing it, because it would be so incredible if it occurs. We’ll see."

Again, I did say RUMOR has it! I am very interested in reading about what happens tonight in NJ. I am thinking there's gonna be some Jay-Z and Nas and Jay-Z and Game collabos going down tonight, if, that is, Jay is really gonna go at 50 Cent. E-Jacques, you're gonna be there...Please give ya boys the run-down tomorrow morning on the Forum!

Peace!

Sheryl Swoope's Right Out the Closet

Sheryl Swoope's Comes Out

This is a pretty interesting story in the sense that this will probably give more women in the WNBA the confidence to come out about their sexuality. And I think it will ALSO give more men (let's not be naive folks) in professional sports the heart to do the same.

Like it says in the article, a couple guys already have, but they were either retired or not at a superstar's status in their sport. Sheryl Swoopes is the reigning WNBA MVP! This is HUGE! I remember back when Olympic swimmer Greg Louganis (sp?) came out. I didn't really understand it back then and the ramifications it had within the sport of swimming, but now that I am older, I can understand how motivational a statement like Sheryl's can become for others who feel "trapped" (shot out to R. Freaky Kelly...Maybe he'll be next to come out).

So now the clock starts ticking on the first male athlete of substantial status to come out the closet. Personally, I think he'll be ridiculed and castigated to no end by most people he has played with. Maybe not in the public eye, but people will be pissed. And I could definitely see an ass-whooping happening in an NFL or NBA locker room. But unfortunately, that's the society we live in. One of little tolerance. I admittedly fall into this category myself. And hopefully most people are like me and are trying to be more open-minded.

But please keep in mind everyone, that there is a damn line that has to be drawn when it comes to tolerance and open-minded-ness (wow, is that a word). Because (in the words of Cedric the Entertainer) "Imma grown ass man dog!" And some things, a grown ass man just don't do! Or in this case, become tolerant of.

Peace!

PHOTO: Generation NEXT...

Just wanted to post this picture of my little brother MAP. No, his name is not "MAP"...It's his initials! We (my family) calls him MAP.

Anyway, this is my brother and his boy Dre! These two are together doing what me and WG used to do...Party!

I'm not sure what those fingers are being thrown up for...That ain't no Capitol Heights sign, that's for sure!

I am sure you can guess which one is my brother (in case you can't, he's on the left).

Rah, how in the hell did you get this picture? I don't even have this joint. Shot out to my brother and Dre! What it do?

Joke of the Day...

I got this in an email forward so I'm probably late. But I thought it was kinda funny....

-----------------------------------
A woman was very distraught over the fact that she had not had a date or any sex for over 5 years. She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so she decided to seek the medical expertise of the well known Chinese sex therapist Dr. Chang.

Upon entering the examination room, Dr.Chang said, "OK, take off all you crose"! The woman did as she was told. "Now get down and craw reery, reery fass to odder side of room". The woman did as she was told. "Now get down and craw reery, reery fass back to me". As she did, Dr. Chang shook his head slowly.

"You problem reery, reery bad. You haf Ed Zachary Disease. Worse case I ever see. Dat why you not haf sex or dates."

The woman asked anxiously, "Oh my gosh, Dr. Chang, what is Ed Zachary Disease"?

Dr. Chang sighed deeply and replied, "Ed Zachary Disease is when your face rook Ed Zachary like your ass.
-----------------------------------

LMAO! Now if that ain't funny, I don't know what is!!!

MOVIE: YOU GOTTA WATCH THIS!!!!

This is the funniest thing I have seen in a minute...LMAO!

RatMonster (Windows Media File)

Shot out to Rah for this one!

Camron Fake-fest begins...

As predicted, Cam is gonna start doing the "ni99as can't take me out, I'm a G!" act...

"In D.C.(D.C.) almost got Body (Bodied), for my Lamborghini, Genie in the bottle/
America’s top model and I got Tyra Bank (bank)/
And I’m back in your city next week to drop off the Weight (wait!)/
Like patients without a doctor, your lady call me doctor (doctor)/
And she the head of the hospital cause she give head in the hospital (proper)/"

-Killa Cam

LMAO! This dude is funny! I can honestly say that I was expecting this and I am definitely expecting more, unfortunately. Shot out to JRock for sending me those lyrics.

----------
Besides, I like the verse my man BHill wrote much much better than the one above. Now keep in mind, he wrote this jokingly and as if he were Camron. Funny thing is, it sounds JUST LIKE something Camron would write.

"You could find me at Howards homecoming with two techs/ leaning on a blue lamborghini, the color of windex/ Chenel specs/peeped three dudes in a cotex/ yeah that's a maxi pad, and not a tampon/ and I aint Pac or Big/ This is Cam'ron/ And I aint runnin nuthin, unless I'm runnin somthin/ Next week I'm on the freeway/pumpin Freeway (right back in DC like I left somethin)/ Now THAT's Stuntin/ Yall aint know? Next monday you can find me in a scream mask/ on New York Ave/ in my signature Pink Rang-Ro/It's dip-set Bitc#"

Best Albums so far this year...

The following is a list of CDs released this year that I think are noteworthy. There is no order of precedence and feel free to let me know if I missed anything.

My genres are Rap/Hip-Hop and R&B. If there are other noteworthy albums from different genres of music, please let me know and help me expand my musical horizons!

Rap/Hip-Hop:
-Game, "The Documentary"
-Beanie Sigel, "The B. Coming"
-Common, "BE"
-Kanye, "Late Registration"
-Little Brother, "The Minstrel Show"
-Black Rob, "The Black Rob Report"
-Young Jeezy - "Thug Motivation 101: Let's Get It"
-Bun B, "Trill"

R&B:
-Raheem DeVaughn, "The Love Experience"
-Dwele, "Some Kinda..."

ADDITIONS:

Jron:
Ludacris, "Red Light District"
Pimp C, "The Sweet James Jones Stories" (FREE PIMP C!)
T.I., "Urban Legend" (Good look, I forgot that joint)
Slim Thug, "Already Platinum"
Worst Album...Mike Jones, "Who is Mike Jones?"

Lauren:
Vivian Green, "Vivian" (Most def Lauren, but she definitely changed up her tone on this album)

Tiff:
Stevie Wonder, "A Time to Love"
Anthony Hamilton, "Soul Life" (Dag, I can't believe I forgot this one!)

Killa Camron...

Camron shot in the Chocolate City

I wasn't gonna blog about this at first because I didn't want to spread the bad news via my blog (cuz I damn sure sent it to a rack of people last night via email). But shot out to JRon on hitting me up about this and giving me a lil motivation to talk about it.

First off, I have been watching/reading this unfold over the last 24 hours. Cam came to H20 by himself in a damn Lamborghini. Mistake #1 Mr. Killa! This is D.C., not NY. Wait for your security you IDIOT! Dudes don't really care about you or who you're affiliated with.

Then Cam leaves H20 (again, by himself) in his sweet ride (wonder if it's HIS or if it's rented...I know he has a Lamborghini, but I don't think that one is blue) and stops at a light. Some dudes pull up beside him and tell him to get out the car. Cam refuses to get out (mistake #2 Mr. Killa) and they start shooting at him.

Okay, the rest of this story is gonna turn into some sort of street legend about Camron and how gangsta he is (whatever) which will piss me off, but here it goes anyway. Camron gets shot in both arms and drives himself to Howard University Hospital.

Okay, let's think about this. A car with (presumably) several armed men in it shoots at you from close range and you only get shot in the arms...Believable, maybe they can't aim. Then, you drive (in a city you are not from) while shot from NJ & NY Avenues to HU Hospital on Howard Homecoming weekend??? This my friends, is NOT believable at all. This is the busiest weekend every year in D.C. and traffic is so bad at nights that they close down certain streets. This feat in my eyes, is very hard to believe. Especially considering Cam is not from D.C. So maybe he's just familiar with the roadways and made that drive (while bleeding and undoubtedly in shock) from H20 to HU Hospital. You be the judge. He was probably lost anyway.

What's next in this story? All $33 in my savings account says that he's gonna fake like he's a superthug, teflon-don, insert other monicker here... I can hear him now faking like he just put his hands up and stopped the bullets like Neo in the Matrix. It's gonna go from him getting shot twice to him getting shot 4 times. From it being 2 dudes shooting at him to a whole crew of dudes shooting at him. So on and so forth...Who cares?

The dude's lucky to be alive! I'm glad he didn't get killed.

Morals of the Story:

#1- Don't go around flossing your expensive material items at the wrong places at the wrong times and by yourself. That's stupid no matter how thugged-out you think you are or portray yourself to be.

#2 - Dudes need to stop hating on others for having things they ain't got. What could you possibly do with a blue lamborghini in D.C.? You can't sell it to anyone. It's not like nobody's gonna know how you got the damn thing! You can't sell it for parts...How many people in the DC area have a damn Lamborghini? So to me this says whoever did this was just haters and wanted to say "I/We robbed Camron!" That's some serious jealousy and hate issues going on. This was a theft that was gonna guarantee you got caught (if you were dumb enough to not dump/burn the car shortly after carjacking the dude).

#3 - "You may see me in D.C. at Howard Homecoming" with a set of bodyguards attached to my right and left arms and driving something a little more conspicuous than a blue Lamborghini. Cam, get your mind right!!!

In the words of Lil Jon...

"To the windooooooowwwwwwww-to-the-wall!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Who'd have guessed there's a condom war going on???

L, you are a fool for this one!

For my DC/PG Folks...

This test is pretty damn funny!

How DC-Metro/PG-County are you???

I scored a 67% on this so I guess that means I've been in Bmore too long. But I love how the questions on the test specifically target 'hate' for Baltimore. Being as though I live in Bmore now I get a big kick out of that.

Jadakiss on Def Jam...Nas on Def Jam?

If this stuff comes to fruition, Imma have a lot to be siced about in the next few months!!!

http://blogs.sohh.com/ya_heard/archives/2005/10/jadakiss_signs.html

The DUMBEST SONG I have heard in a minute...

Click the link below to watch the video:

Laffy Taffy

If you haven't already heard the song, you don't need to get your hopes up at all! I heard alot of negative stuff about this song prior to watching the video earlier (I had never heard it before watching the video) and I can honestly say that the comments WERE NOT negative enough. This is quite possibly the dumbest song I have heard ever! And the video just makes it worse!



These dudes are some CLOWNS! The dances in the video are completely hilarious. I can't stop laughing!!

There's some guy who wrote a GREAT blog entry about this. I think it's hilarious. Check it out!

Not a Foxxy fan like that, but I feel bad for her...

because she can't hear!

It's kinda sad that she can't even hear her own music. Not that it's ground-breaking or anything. But imagine (and this is NOT a comparison of musicians) if Beethoven or Tchiakovsky lost their hearing halfway through their musical works. You'd really feel for them because it's what they do and what they love. And in Foxxy's case, I hope it's what she loves, but moreso, it's what she does to make a living. So it's even more vital for her to be able to hear because who knows what else she'd be doing if she wasn't in the studio creating songs.

Again, I'm not her #1 fan or anything, but I like some of her stuff and I think it's messed up that she is losing her hearing. BUT, she should have gotten immediate help, so she kinda brought all this on herself. But I can't really fault her b/c we all do stuff like that from time-to-time. "Stuff like that" meaning, we prolong doing what we need to do and it comes back to bite us in the butt.

I hope she gets her hearing back though. Because I can't imagine living without my hearing and/or my vision.

Early leader for the Dumbass Award for the Week...

ME!

This morning:

Woke up a little late, but not too late. Ironed my clothes, got in the car...

Making right from Hillsway onto Perring Parkway and the car in front of me has a clear opening. There are no cars coming so they can go. I see the car move forward so I look back to make sure no cars magically appeared (and I can go too) and I don't see any cars so I start moving forward. Only to turn around and see that I am 5 feet away from the bumper of the car in front of me. Why they didn't just go, well I dunno!

I slam on brakes, skid right into their bumper. BAM!

NOW! Fortunately for both of us 1) My car has that license plate holder in the front and 2) they were driving a Saturn with one of those rubbermaid bumpers on the rear of the car. We both stopped. I got out, checked out their car to see if it was any damage...None! Yes! I'm good, no insurance company info needs to be exchanged. One of the girls in that car literally hopped out of the passenger side with one shoe on (must have been getting dressed). I asked her if she was okay, she said yes. I asked her if the other girl was okay, she said yes. She looked at their car and said "Oh, it's cool." I said "Ayight, my bad! Have a nice day!" And we both drove off.

Whewww!!!!!

Moral of the story.
Before you press the gas, make sure the car in front of you actually merged. "Huh-huh...You BIG DUMMY!"

Female QB throws 3 TD's in high school game...

I might be one of few people who think this is a GOOD thing, but it's all good. I wouldn't mind seeing women on the football field. At least on the high school level. It might get dangerous on the collegiate or pro levels though because those guys take no prisoners and will really try to hurt you. But on the high school level, I think it'd be cool to go watch a girl throw three TD's!

http://sports.espn.go.com/sports/news/story?id=2187201

Explanation: DC Metro Area Slang

Disclaimer: I didn't make these words up and I did not come up with the definitions.

Some of these I still use (actually quite a few), but some of these I don't use at all. A couple I have never even heard of. In any event, here's an explanation for those of you who wonder what I am saying at times...

THE DC/METRO AREA EBONICS DICTIONARY

ASS'D OUT - to be left hanging, stood up: "Man, we was sposed to meet at the library but he left me ass'd out!"

BAMMA - a person who is not very trendy, whether it be fashion or music: "Ugh! Look at his shape-up...and his beat-up Pro Wings. Hes such a bamma"

BLOWN - very upset/disappointed

BOOSTED - to be excited, proud: "He was so boosted when he found out he got an A on his history test"

BUN - v. to make one a steady girl/boyfriend: "She's the complete package; looks, smarts and she cool to be around. i had to bun her"
n. a pretty girl/boy: "I was looking at ur sister yesterday, and I didnt realize but, she's a bun"

CARRY - to disrespect someone: "Jimmy tried to holla at Crystal, but she carried him by walking away"

CHILL MODE - calm, collected: "Afterschool, I just be on chill mode, dawg"

CRUSH - to consume speedily or with vigor; or to defeat handily (see PUNISH): "Those Steakums were bomb, man we crushed them joints"

GET YOUR MAN - have success, whether with a girl or in sports. Refers to competitive situations: "Ima get my man today. We gonna punish Suitland"

GUMP - a nerd and/or wimp: "I dared him to touch her butt, but he a gump"

JAH, JI -kinda/sorta or very, depending on emphasis: "She is jah phat"

JONING - making fun of another person: "Did u see that dudes shape-up? They was joning at the lunch table all period"

KIRK (v. to KIRK OUT) - to get very mad, or excited beyond ones normal range: "If the teacher wasnt there, he woulda kirked on that dude"

LUNCHING - joking around, acting foolishly: "During my free periods, we just be walking around or straight lunching, cuz we be bored"

NO BULL,BULLSH*T, B-SH*T- to mean something truthful; equivalent to "Im telling the truth": "Man, thats exactly what happened. No bull"

OVERCOMPENSATE - to do more than is nessacary in a given situation by showing off: "I mean, i know its hot but stop overcompensating man, put your shirt back on"

PRESSED - to be annoying, conceited: "He was so pressed to show everyone he got an A; he gets on my nerves"

PUNISH - to dispense with readily, to handle easily; deals with sexual intercourse when used in reference to girls

ROCK - to wear or sport. "You need to gimme back my damn AJA IMANI headband so i can rock it with this shirt I got to match"

SACK CHASER (ie Golddigger)- A woman who is only interested in a man for his money

SHORT - unfortunate: "I cant give u a ride, young. either ask Chris or u short"

SICE - to over exaggerate: "Tamika not even that tight Isaac Ji Siced her.

SLAM - directly: "He wasn't looking and the ball hit him slam in the head"

SLUMP - to knock down and/or out with extreme force. "Dog, you keep f*ckin around with girl like that and imma have to slump your wack ass."

SMASH - have sexual intercourse: "Ima ja blown cuz I went over her house, and her parents were there, so I couldnt smash"

SON-SON - same as "dawg" and "dogg", but normally someone younger: "Young, dont talk about Jason. Thats my son-son"

STEAL - to punch, assault someone: "Young, if u dont get out my face, Ima steal u slam in ur jaw"

STOUT - A very attractive male or female in both the face and body.

TIP DRILL - A woman or man who is only attractive from the neck down.

WACK - unfavorable, uncool, unpoplar or very loser-like. 1. "What is with this wack-ass grade you gave me? i got all the right answers and you still gave me a 'D', man"
2. "Do you know how wack you look right now? If I ever see you wear those highwater jeans and small-ass t-shirt again....."

YOUNG, JOE - equivalent to "son" or "kid" in NY; similar to "yo" also: "Young, Im sick of school" or "Chill out, joe. It aint even that serious"

JRon's Requests:
FAKIN' - Fakin is when you are acting like you are someone or something you obviously are not, have not been, and most likely never will be. This would be equivalent to frontin' in places like NY/NJ. For example, you could be faking like you are a thug (i.e - "faking like he go hard"). You could be "faking like you got money" when you are really as broke as the rest of us.

LUNCHIN' - this basicaly means you are tripping, crazy, lost your mind, or making people laugh. For example, you are lunchin' if you pay $100 for a $10 shirt. And you are also lunching if you are in the club dancing like you have back and leg spasms.

PHAT-TO-DEATH - This really needs no explanation. This is strictly for men to describe the ladies. Free from 106 & Park basically sums this one up. This means you have the body of a goddess! 36-24-36! If I had to describe this in brand names I'd say Hooters, 15 Minute Abs, Apple Bottoms, Thigh Master, and "Your local Nail Shop HERE".

MISSING PERSON: No joke

This is text from an email I got from a friend. Her friend is looking for her sister. I know putting this up on my blog may not mean anything and it's a long-shot, but I'll post it anyway because you never know.

If you are in the Baltimore area or the DC/Baltimore Metro Area, please take a quick second to read it over.

---------------------------------

Hey everybody

I am trying to locate my sister so all I ask is that you forward this email to
you circle of friends and ask them to do the same. Hopefully this will
eventually be read by my sister or someone who knows her.

My name is Yolanda Harris (maiden name; Saunders). I am trying to locate my
sister Tina Saunders. I am not sure if this is still her last name, she may have
been married. The last contact I had with her was about 4 years ago and I
believe she was working at the downtown courthouse in the old post office building.
I know that she has at least one son who should be around 20 maybe.

If you are reading this email and think you may know her please contact me at
yolanda101377@yahoo.com. Thanks for all your help.

In Miami, this song was the...

you know the rest...Kept the party going! Soul Survivor and Diamonds on My Neck. Those two songs will forever invoke memories of Summer in Miami 2005. Shot out to Laf, Rah, Young Cheezy (Nadine too...LMAO!), JRon, and everybody else...

"AKON AND YOUNG JEEEEEEEEEEZY! Gotta take it easy!!!!!"






A young vintage Rico from Paid in Full. "I'm bout to slap your. . .head off your. . .shoulders!" If you have seen the movie, you know exactly what I am talking about.







The pink in the background..."Dawg, that ain't GANGSTA!"